My Testimony

At the age of 16, I wanted to disappear. Indeed, I did think that nobody would miss me all that much. Although, I was becoming a little less so, introvert was my middle name. My outlook on life was low at best. In fact, I had the idea stuck in my head that I was doomed to be like my father. He was an alcoholic, never held a job long and an absent parent. Not the best life to aspire to. The few friends I had were not the best caliber. They did not treat me well and they dabbled in drugs. I did have sense enough to stay out of that scene. Thank God! (Actually, I did not really believe there was a God at the time.) I wanted desperately to be anyone but myself. Really just wanted to be that confident party going jock that always had a girlfriend. Unfortunately, I was really just the nerdy, quiet kid who mostly went unnoticed but when noticed it was only in a bad way. So, I did everything I could to not be noticed. I wasn’t really doing anything wrong, yet, but wasn’t doing anything right either.

So, when a girl I liked invited me to a church function of course I said yes. Her group of friends accepted me with no problem. They didn’t seem to notice my shy personality. After only a short time I was part of the friend group. The only price to pay for admittance was accepting Jesus into my heart. John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” That verse and others were repeated ad nauseum. So I took the leap. Otherwise, I am afraid I would be out. I prayed with my friend and I was in. By the next day people were congratulating me and making a big deal. It was a little embarrassing honestly as I did not want to be center of attention. Wasn’t really sure what the big deal was. Until …

It was an evening service. The sanctuary was packed. I was standing in the back of the room with my new found friends. There was the normal singing and prayer then there was a call for anyone who wanted to share to come forward and speak on a microphone to the entire gathering. It was all adults talking about this and that. I thought to myself how foolish. I would never give up that type of personal information. It would surely be used against me. Then the unthinkable happened. One of the girls from my new friend group headed to the microphone. I was aghast as she began to pour her heart out in front of a room full of people she mostly didn’t even know. Through tears she relayed how broken she was and the need for forgiveness. Proverbs 28:13 “He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion.” I was stunned. What would drive someone to share such personal information? In my life, up until that moment, any sign of weakness would have been thrown in your face, used against you, stepped on a few times then held over your head at every convenience. I watched her receive hugs, prayer and encouragement. It was at that point that I understood that there was something to this Chrisian stuff and I was desperate to experience it. I even tried to share my decision with a number of people. The reacitons were interesting … “Foolishness! God doesn’t exist! The church just wants your money! Now you will become a priest and never have sex! Just a bunch of rules! Why would you do a dumb thing like that!” To name a few. It was a little discouraging at first. It seemed so difficult a path to walk. I even tried to turn away from my new path only to find it empty and lonely. I was hooked. I reapplied myself in the privacy of my bedroom. Tears flowed freely. I was confused how I could feel both broken and strong at the same time. I would understand better soon after.

It wasn’t much later that I became aware of the Holy Spirit in me. I learned to trust the things that the Bible says. I wanted to learn more. 2 Timothy 3:16 ” All scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness” The validity of the Bible has been supported in my daily experiences. Every time the scripture is tested it is proven accurate and sometimes in unexpected ways. I trust what is written in it fully now. It has never failed me. Over the years I have had my ups and downs for sure. Each crisis I face my first reaction is to turn to God. Over time I have learned to lean on God in the good times as well. I hope you will do the same.

John 19:35 “And he who has seen has testified, and his testimony is true; and we know that he is telling the truth, so that you also may believe.” Please share your testimony. I would love to hear it.

2 thoughts on “My Testimony

  1. I love your use of Bible verses. Very applicable to your testimony. I wasn’t familiar with all of these. Thanks for sharing.

    Like

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